Tuesday, August 20, 2013

What is a Wheezing Gorilla?

So after reading the title of this first post you might be asking yourself that very question.  Well to put it simply, I'm a 39 yr old fat man who decided it would be a good idea to take up running.  And the only way I can describe what I must look like when I run is that of a wheezing gorilla! 

See, I'm not the most slender of individuals and I have to turn my running music up loud enough so that I can't hear my own breathing!  So to poke a little fun at myself and that's the name I came up with. 

This blog is not meant to impress you with my creative abilities or humor (although that will happen quite often), but rather a place I can write about my attempt to become a world class distance runner!  Or at least good enough to run in a local 5k.   I'm hopeful that it will become a place where I can provide others with some inspiration, perspiration, humor, and encouragement.  It won't be for everyone, it may just wind up being for me!

With that said let me give you some history...

This is not my first attempt at running, it's actually my fourth.  See I've tried this running thing twice before in the last 2 years and once about 5 years ago. 

The first time I started I had to quit because the treadmill that I had been running on sounded like it was going to come through the second floor of our 100 yr old 2 story house.  Wheezing Gorilla was more like Earthquake Causing Gorilla back then. 

Then when my wife, who I call My Woman, and I (yes I call her my woman, I'm a gorilla what do you expect??) moved or little family to a new home in a small town I decided that running in the great outdoors was the way to go!  And there for a while, I did alright.  Wheezing Gorilla version 1.0 was born.  Well it doesn't take long before life makes you too busy and it becomes easy to say "I'll do it tomorrow".  This of course is code for "I'm not disciplined, I'm just lazy".  It's the reason so many exercise resolutions wind up dying.  So life got too busy and I quit.

The second go round of Wheezing Gorilla started last summer when I thought it would be a great idea to start running right at the end of the hottest summer in recent history!  IKR?  (That's "I know, right?" in teen texting language for all you who don't understand the way kids text these days!)  So again, I felt I was doing good, think I was even up over 2 miles average after a month or so.  Then just like an Axel Rose solo, the cold November rain came and told my lungs "Hey!  You can't run in the cold air!"  Unfortunately my lungs agreed.  Wheezing Gorilla 2.0 took to the couch in a cloud of despair and banana peels.

So that brings us to This year's model of the Wheezing Gorilla!  Starting in spring of this year, I decided that my decline into the slug-life had to stop.  Pants were a little tighter than I remembered.  I would get winded watching football and have to take a nap!  My woman accused me of snoring more (or so she says, I didn't hear anything!)  So I laced up the old New Balance and hit the pavement!  Wheezing Gorilla 3.0 had arrived!

This time around I have set new records.  I've increased my longest run to 5.15 miles in 1 hour.  I've been averaging around 3 miles recently.  And I'm also planning to run my first 5k before that magic age of 40!

My Woman has really been one of my biggest fans in this most recent attempt.  To her defense she's been a bit busy with a full time class schedule these past few years.  But she has bought me new running shirts, phone arm band, light band (I run mainly at night) and a new pair of Brooks running shoes (there will be a separate post dedicated to my Brooks).  I guess with all this gear I owe it to her to stick with it.

I also need to thank my Aunt Sonya.  Aunt Sonya has been a running inspiration to me.  10 years my senior, she has been a consistent runner for quite a few years now.  She has run everything from a 5k to a half marathon!  And before she turns 50 she's planning to run a full!  As My Baby Girl (my daughter) said when I told her what Aunt Sonya wanted to do "That woman cray cray".  Love my Aunt Sonya

I really wished I would have started this blog before now.  But like they say, there's no time like the present.  I'm hoping that this blog will help me be accountable to a consistent running lifestyle.  I'll pretty it up in time, but more importantly I'll add posts of my running experiences.

Later

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